Hi there. I just got back from South Carolina. Details about the trip are coming up in another entry.

Anyway.

If heartache…crap, i never thought I’d say that word. Okay. Basically I feel like shit. FUCK! I SHOULD OF KNOWN HE’D HAVE A FUCKING GIRLFRIEND!!

*sigh*

I think you can take it from there.

Yes I did like him very much.

Yes, I was afraid to make a move.

Yes, this always keeps happening to me.

Shit. Now I think I know what Diana feels like. Suddenly I feel ugly as hell, I feel like I bore people. Everything about me is negative. I’m fat as hell too.

CRAP! WHY IS HE ALWAYS SO GODAMNN SWEET TO ME.

“I needed an excuse to hug you”

OMG! Dammit. If theres one thing that makes me weak, its charm. DAMMIT. I SOUND LIKE SUCH A FUCKING SAPPY LOVE PUPPY!! I WISH I COULD CONTAIN MY FEELINGS!

Rosabella was right. It’s good to keep yourself from liking someone too much. Because you never know if it’s going to turn out bad.

…

BUT IT WAS ALL GOING AMAZINGLY!!! And suddenly…I’m gone for SIX DAYS…and BAM…he has someone.

Fuck it. Fuck it all.

Okay, I’ll be going now. I need to keep myself occupied so I can take my mind off this idiocracy.

~Eleia, hating herself